Day 2. Here sharky sharky…

Today is the “Swim With Whale Sharks” portion of our well-planned trip. We get all geared up, head to the boat and experience the Tropical Way of doing things. And the Island Way is a juggernaut. You can’t beat it, so it’s best to just let any idea of “schedule” go. So here’s how getting ready to go look for whale sharks works. Belize has figured out that whale sharks are a boon the local economy and have wisely protected the sharks, devising an actual plan to regulate how many boats can work the reef at one time. The method of determining those slots is a sophisticated method called “First Come, First Serve.” Now, normally this would be a disaster. Boats queuing up early, people jockeying for position, possible bad words and feuds, cutters and cheaters, and general chaos (think New York Subway at rush-hour). Belize? Nope. In Belize, you apparently vie for one of the coveted slots by arriving “around 8.30 am” hang around the dive shop for a bit, chat, laugh, slowly get into the boat to ride over to where, for no discernible reason, you get your fins. Hang out on the dock, get back into the boat, ride back to the dive shop, park, get off, go into the shop and get your mask and snorkel, go to the bathroom, get some drinks, laugh, get into the boat, and then head to the anchor point, arrive at the anchor point at about 10.30, meet the Park Ranger, laugh, give him some food, and then begin looking for whale sharks. If you were a Swiss Train Conductor I think your head would explode.

But that’s just the beginning. Now I get that looking for whale sharks is what these folks do for a living, and clearly they know more than me about the process, but I have comments. After leaving the Park Ranger, you ride around and look for fins. OK, it’s a third world country, its not the most sophisticated method, but I get this part, it makes sense. So we’re driving around looking for fins (that’s Sander doing his part), and we’re all looking real, real hard, when the Captain says, “OK, no luck looking. I’m going to turn on the fish finder and look for schools of fish that might be snapper.” Wait, we have a fish finder? The plan is that since the snapper spawn brings the whale sharks to the area (they like the eggs, I guess for whale sharks eating 9,000,000 eggs doesn’t affect their cholesterol) we’ll use the divers to swim just above the snapper and have them bunch up and blow bubbles to mimic an egg spawn, which, according to the Captain, is a “dinner bell” for whale sharks. And I’m largely cool with it, I mean, a regular shark can smell blood from a mile away, so maybe whale sharks can see snapper eggs from a mile away? Right? But here’s the thing I could never get past. If we have a fish finder, and if a whale shark is as big as a school bus (they are) why not just drive around until something as big as a school bus lights up the fish finder and then jump in the water? I mean, are these Stealth Whale Sharks? I managed to go with the flow for everything else in Belize, but I…couldn’t…get…past…that. I just stared at the fish finder and wondered. And no, I didn’t ask the question. Whatever part of my brain shut down the “If you bring Sander’s sun shirt, make sure you bring your own,” moved on to “If you have a question about the fish finder, you could probably get an answer by asking” part of my noggin. Yes folks, my brain is strange and mysterious thing.

So we all get in the water and follow the scuba divers around for a while. And here’s where I noticed the strange part of intently searching for something. I was looking for a creature as large as a submarine in water as clear as air. There was no vegetation or obstacles to block my view or hide said submarine sized creature. However, I was looooooooking and straining my eyes like I was searching for Waldo. Like this leviathan was lurking right behind me, and when I turned it turned, or it was hiding behind a smelt or something. If this thing swam up it would be impossible to miss. But I still kept straining. Anyway this thought kept me busy for the entire time (I also chase laser dots). So, the divers dive, and the snorkelers (that’s me and Sander) snorkel. We see a lamprey that followed the divers like a curious dog the whole time. Hey, did I mention that from way above lampreys look and move like sharks? This particular shark/lamprey was following the scuba divers looking like he was after a meal. I thought for sure that I was going to have a truly unique story to tell everyone. But not this time. So anyway, we’ve now been at sea for 4 hours and we’ve seen a lamprey. Neat sure, but not why we came to Belize. Eventually the divers need to come up, which takes forever, and we’re just swimming around the endless ocean waiting for them, and my back is cooking. Soon we’ll add Colorado Lobster to the list of sea creatures seen that day.

Lunch is actually nice. We drive to the reef and pull inside so the water is like glass. Love that. The guides bring out a meal of chicken and rice, and my young boy, a picky eater among picky eaters, just dives in. He’s really embracing the idea of eating what’s available! This, to me, is almost bigger than seeing a whale shark (and just as rare). I was too stunned to take a picture. After the meal Sander fishes like a local, meaning he throws a line in the water, sans pole, and catches a fish. This, by the way, is how the “commercial” fishermen do it too. They drive way out in these little boats and sit and put line over the edge and catch fish all day. They put what looks like sections of hose on their fingers so the line doesn’t cut them up, and tie t-shirts around their heads like Bedouin tribesmen. No canopy, no radio, just one or two guys sitting in a tiny boat with shirts tied around their heads and garden hose hands holding a fishing line over the edge catching fish. You know it’s a poor place when fishing poles are considered “luxury items.” After fishing, we jump in the water and explore the reef. It was a really swell little reef, and my charring back seemed to attract loads of fish. Belize is just amazing. While looking for whale sharks, we eat lunch, and as a “may as well do something” event we swim at a reef that’s like swimming in an aquarium full of beautiful fish and colorful coral.

After lunch we drive and scan for a bit, no luck. So its back in the water to swim and look for sharks because this is apparently more efficient than driving and looking for them. Again, not to beat this to death, but I feel like a powerboat can cover more ground than a bunch of tourists with fins. But that’s just me. So we’re looking and looking, and see…a turtle. Granted this was a humongous sea turtle. In fact, this was the largest turtle I’ve ever seen (and I’ve probably seen at least six in my life-that’s more than one hand you know). But that’s it. Nothing else. Well except for millions of little red things in the water that the guide tells us are “jelly fish larvae” (you can see them in some of the water pics). For good measure, he stresses that if they get into your clothes and hatch they sting, but that these will “probably” die first because they shouldn’t be hatching for a while. This is a great thing to think about as you swim around and feel the water on your nether regions. Oh, and did I mention that Sander had a cast? I tried not to think about 10,000 little jellyfish hatching in his cast, ticked off and hungry. To quell this thought, I promised myself to wash the cast like Lady Macbeth washed her hands.

Anyway, the divers run out of air again and still no whale shark. Sander is hugely disappointed, and when I make the requisite, “Well, we did see a ‘WHALE TURTLE,’” joke he’s less than amused (honestly, thinking back on it, he was right. It was a pretty lame joke). That’s Sander on the boat, not giving up, not for a second, on seeing a Whale Shark fin. Gotta love the fight.

So we go home, and on the long drive back he notices that his bottom tooth is loose, and not just loose, but really loose. This provides conversation and distraction for the whole ride home (by the by, we broke international law again and Sander drove-shhhhhhh). So we’re back at our “resort” eating dinner, kind of bummed about not seeing the whale shark on “Whale Shark” day, but getting cool with it because looking for a whale shark in the open ocean is not like looking for one in an aquarium, and that this is what adventuring is all about, the chase. Then something truly amazing happens. His tooth falls out. It’s like life handed me the perfect distraction! So we spend the night wondering about the tooth fairy. Is it one tooth fairy, or is there one for each country? If there are multiple, do they talk? If it’s one tooth fairy, does she give out local or American currency? Lots to discuss.

The next morning he had $10 Belize under his pillow. You can draw your own conclusions.